Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Blowing off Steam

Yesterday, Jupiter had a full blown screaming tantrum.

It's been awhile since that's happened.

On Sunday, we were home most of the day, and it was a great day. Jupiter used a nice polite voice and words all day. She said "I forgive you," when I had to do some work (pulling the waterlogged carpet out of the basement before the next storm) instead of playing with her. Later that day, we played the matching card game and she kept giving me her matches. It was so sweet.

Monday evening was another story. Jupiter couldn't get settled and into bed...she'd been rocking and I disturbed the rocking and then it was all over. She wanted me to read to her again, (I'd already read a whole Magic Tree House book), and she wanted the soft sheet off my bed to put on her bed. Then she couldn't or wouldn't go back to sleep. My take is that she was just feeling stubborn and defiant at that point and wouldn't go to sleep because I told her too. So finally, at 9pm, I said, "Fine. Stay up. Don't go to sleep. Tomorrow you will have natural consequences. But I'm going to bed."

I fell asleep somewhere around 9:30. When I woke up at 11:30, she'd fallen asleep with the light on. So I don't really know what time she actually fell asleep.

I woke her up at 6am as usual. She got ready for school. She got through school without any major issues (she claims she fell asleep twice, but I don't have confirmation). After school, at Mimi's house, she lost it. Her blanket fort fell down and she wasn't able to ask nicely for help to get it fixed. So she didn't recieve any help.

Hence the screaming tantrum. 10 minutes. When she was done, she had something to eat.

When I picked her up, she was exhausted, but very mellow. She had a shower, ate her supper, listened to one chapter of a story, and went to sleep.

Sometimes I think she just needs to blow everything off. Even if the goal is no loud screaming two year oldish tantrums, I have to think that yesterday the tantrum served a purpose. She felt better afterward.

Tuesday, March 23, 2010

"You can't just do nothing with your life."

Jupiter said this to me in all seriousness on Sunday. I wish I could have blogged about it at that moment, because the entire conversation is now lost. I just remember the earnestness in her tone when she told me that, followed by a whole listing of things that qualfied life as "something." That was after she told me that the cinnamon bread I made out of the leftover pizza dough was the best ever, and maybe we could even bring some to the White House and there could be a law. I'm not sure what kind of law, exactly. Some kind of law regarding cinnamon bread, apparently.

This whole conversation was after I came outside to play soccer and discovered that Jupiter, in a huff because I had a couple things to do before I could come out and play soccer, trampled and uprooted 1/4 of the daylillies that are coming up over by the mailbox. We had discussed the daylillies in depth on Saturday when I looked over and saw her stomping on them, so we had to discuss that despite the fact that they are not in the "garden", they are still living garden plants and needed to be respected. Perhaps the daylilly patch needs a clearly defined rock border, since she doesn't bother the plants in the gardens. But then again, since we had the conversation, I know she attacked them on Sunday to express her displeasure with me. I expressed my displeasure with the wrecked flowers by choosing not to play soccer at all.

Did I tell you that on Saturday we found soccer socks with the shin guards already inside them at the kids consignment shop? For $1.99? I bought them on the off chance they fit. They fit perfectly. Couldn't ask for better. So now every time she wears them she appears to turn into Mia Hamm. A month from now, when soccer actually starts, she'll probably be done with them.

I just got House Rules from the library on Friday. (Along with 21 other books, but that's another whole story). One of the main characters in the story is on the autism spectrum. Jodi Picoult does such amazing, complete research when she creates a story and its characters. Although Jupiter is not on that particular spectrum, the character also has the sensory issues, the literal thinking, and the need for routine. LOVE LOVE LOVE this book. I'm only on page 117 and already I'm trying not to peek ahead to find out who killed the social skills tutor. I have yet to get through a Jodi Picoult novel without peeking ahead to find out who did the killing or who dies. Check back, and I'll let you know if I make it through this one. Not likely.

Speaking of routine. I went on Jupiter's field trip to the Planetarium on Friday. At lunchtime, I left to go do some errands. 25 minutes later, I got a call. I missed the call, because when I was in the classroom I put my phone on vibrate instead of its noisy ring. The missed call was from the school phone number. Of course.

Friday is pizza day in the lunchroom. Jupiter has hot lunch on Fridays, and only Fridays, because it's pizza day in the lunchroom. (She also refuses to eat my homemade pizza anymore because the school pizza is better. That's just mean.) This Friday, however, the cook was cleaning the kitchen, and created something called "Quesedilla pizza." Jupiter looked at the aide and said, "THIS is NOT my pizza and I am NOT eating this." And she didn't.

Normally we would do a natural consequence. But hunger is not an okay consequence for Jupiter. Hunger, either because her blood sugar plummets or because it causes a subconscious fear reaction in her going back to the time when she was hungry all. the. time. and not fed, causes her behavior to tank. The classroom aide dug through the box of snacks and found a package of peanut butter crackers so she would at least have something. I got back to school about 1:45 with a full lunchbox. She decided she didn't like the group snack either (vanilla animal crackers, so she was just being cranky and stubborn about that) but ate some of the lunch during snack, some after recess, and some in the car after we left school.

She now refuses to eat hot lunch even on Fridays because she doesn't trust the lunch people to make pizza when they say they will.

She labled me with a name tag. Since I almost never get to go to school, she stuck a piece of masking tape to my shirt and wrote Mom on it so everyone would know who I was.

I saved it.

Sunday, March 14, 2010

Supposedly it's all the kids

At literacy night, I asked one of the K teachers (not Jupiter's) if all the kids were extra wild this week, or if it's just mine. She said it was all of them.

I sure hope so. I haven't had a chance to blog lately so I'll hit the hilights.

Jupiter failed to respond to the whistle ending noon recess three times this week. So on Thursday, she lost her afternoon recess. Afternoon recess is at the very end of the day, so the loss doesn't really affect her classroom functioning ability. She got to stay in the room and put her head down. Probably having some quiet time didn't hurt her at all, really. Of course, we had Literacy night Thursday night from 6-7pm. Jupiter was functional until about 6:18. Then she ran all around the cafeteria, then she said she was going to get a drink in the hallway. I found her in the lost and found. She found her hat. It took her until 8:30 to go to sleep.

Around 9pm I went to get ready for bed. I went in the bathroom and my feet got wet. At 5:40, before we left for Literacy Night, Jupiter closed the sink drain, left the water on a teeny trickle, and off we went.

I drained the water out of the sink, wiped up the floor, and listened to the rain falling in my basement for the next 20 minutes. Hopefully the sub floor will dry and I won't have a bathroom sink fall into my basement some day.

She wrote 100 on my mother's lampshade.

She drew a picture on the bathroom vanity at my mother's house. B reports it's a nice picture.

Last night I started to brush my teeth. The toothpaste seemed to taste funny. The bubbles were weird too. Then I noticed it smelled like soap. The soap didn't taste very good. It was unfortunate that I brushed for a whole minute before I figured it out, because it created a whole lot of not nice tasting bubbles.

Even the riding teacher asked me yesterday if Jupiter had had a long day or was up late the night before. I managed not to say that Jupiter's day wasn't nearly as long as mine was :).

She did let me go to Walmart while she was at dance class yesterday. Of course I rushed and when I got back to dance listened for screaming and crying. There was none, although when I peeked in the window Jupiter seemed to have her plaid skirt on over her leotard. The very same skirt that she took OFF in the grocery store before dance because she decided it didn't go with her leotard.

And the messes. Jupiter wants me to check her room now. Last I knew she shoved everything in her closet...but at least she's making SOME effort.

And today is time change. whoohoo. Maybe this will be the worst of the season change behaviorals. I sure hope so.

Jupiter is cleaning her room

She was being destructive (her word) earlier. I wouldn't call it destructive so much as being just plain messy. She threw all the stuffed animals out of her closet, threw the dress up set of plastic drawers out of the closet, and took down a bunch of her clothes hanging in the closet and threw those on the floor.

My contribution to the cleanup has been reassembling the dress up drawers and putting them back where they belong. The stuffed animals and costumes and clothes that are on the floor she can pick up. Or I can pack them in a bag and take them to good*ill tomorrow on my lunch break. She has been warned.

I've already picked up that mess twice this week, one of which was yesterday. I am not doing it again. Yesterday she shouted at me to get her "ME ME ME" book while I was cleaning up the mess. I was not impressed.

She just came out in the Christmas dress that I tried all of December to get her to put on so I could take her Christmas picture. Maybe I'll take her Easter picture in it. I'll title it, " The Picture of Defiance." I just sent her back to her room and set the timer. I don't necessarily need her to pick up all the stuff. But I would like (aren't dreams nice?) her to show some EFFORT into taking responsibilty for the mess she has made.

I hear lots of singing going on. Listen for the shouting when I go in there with my big plastic bag. Some of you may be able to hear it.....

Wednesday, March 3, 2010

Sick days are over

Well, Jupiter is back to normal.

Her normal high level energy is back. She's extra tired today from her first day back at school. She is not listening or making good choices.

I am blogging with my feet on her underwear drawer.

She was supposed to be putting her underwear on properly, but chose to rip it up instead. Then she didn't get why I wouldn't let her have a new pair of underwear to replace the destroyed one. I did let her keep the pj pants since she didn't rip those. And since I know she will get her own pair the very second I leave the room (and since I know from the name calling scratching and spitting that she needs some time to herself at the moment, I have to leave the room) she will get in the underwear drawer herself, I took the whole underwear drawer with me when I left the room.

She's got her music going now. Either she will fall asleep in two minutes from sheer exhaustion or she will keep rocking and eventually call me to lay down with her, in a much calmer state.

Still waiting to see which it will be.